We all desire deep connection. We’re wired for intimacy. But searching for it is difficult and even when we find our person and we’re caught up in the excitement of falling in love, our journey to intimacy has really only just begun.
Throughout partnership and marriage, our connection ebbs and flows. Sometimes we feel extremely close; at other times, we feel estranged and distant from the person with whom we want to feel most intimately connected.
How do we restore deep, authentic intimacy?
Dr. Steve Call and his wife, Lisa Call, address this question in their book, Reconnect: Insights and Tools for Cultivating Meaningful Connection in Your Marriage. In today’s episode we discuss the following and more!
Needing connection and the shame that often accompanies this need.
Shame in relationships—judging ourselves and our partner.
How discussing need, shame, and judgment minimizes their power and their negative impact on our connections.
The healing power of relationships, connection, and community.
Attachment styles and how they influence our intimacy.
How to be gentle with ourselves and our stories.
The lies of shame e.g. “If I told my partner this, I’d be rejected.
The “story” we tell ourselves about our worth, needs, and what it means to be in partnership.
Conceptualizing empathy as “feeling into” instead of “fixing.”
The power of what Steve and Lisa call a “right brain to right brain” response—what this is and how it builds connection.
How a fear that empathy isn’t enough actually blocks intimacy.
The essentials of connection!
The importance of rituals of connection—including play!
The Calls’ insight and wisdom provide crucial tools for relating—whether you hope to deepen intimacy with your partner or build connection to friends and family members.
Dr. Steve & Lisa Call
Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook
Single is the New Black Audiobook:
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